How do you know you’re doing what you’re supposed to be doing?
I said yes to a speaking engagement with only a week’s notice (on top of our already busy schedule that week). I was lying in bed somewhat stressed about all that needed to get done and stressed because my message wasn’t coming together as quickly as I would have liked it to. My husband said to me, “Do you regret saying yes?” Me, without even a pause or a moments hesitation, “No, not at all.” I could tell he was somewhat surprised at my quick response.
I would do it all again next week because as I’m preparing my message I think of those women. And I count it a privilege and an honor that the Lord would choose me to bring encouragement through His Word to those ladies.
Is there a cost to doing what I do? Absolutely. Every time. You should see my house during speaking weeks…or not. It is emotional, mental, spiritual, and when I’m in my message-prep zone, it consumes me (just ask my husband and kids). And the enemy almost always tries to attack me.
But I would do it all again next week (and actually as I type this I will be doing it all again next week). Why do I do this to myself? Because no matter how nervous or stressed I get, it’s what I know I was created to do.
The Lord continues to open the doors, and I continue to walk through them. It’s the one thing in my life where I know that it has absolutely nothing to do with me and that it’s ALL Him. I have to be completely dependent on Him. If He doesn’t show up, then it’s merely just a talk. But as I depend on Him and trust Him for His peace and for all the words, He takes over. And it’s His presence and His Holy Spirit that changes and encourages hearts, not me. I just have to be obedient.
Sometimes we think life would be easier if we just stopped doing this or that- but last time I checked, God didn’t call me to living the easier life. He called me to be obedient. I know we all have something that the Lord calls us to do, and it might feel uncomfortable or awkward or hard. But then when we step out in faith and do that thing, even through the struggles to get there, we just know…. this.is.it.
The calling, His calling- it is a blessing and a burden, but it is also a great honor. And we carry on, doing what we know He’s called us to do. Not by my might or by my strength but by His Spirit (Zech. 4:6).